Friday, December 23, 2016

et tu, mamoon?



It had been a particularly exhausting week (around three weeks ago) and I hadn’t been sleeping well too.  When finally Sunday came around, I wanted to wake up late and also catch some sleep in the afternoon.  This pattern of my wishful Sundays has been going on for too long.  After the frustration and irritation of missed Sunday siestas invariably due to sounds and noise, I have taken this in my stride and have learnt to go sleepless.  But that Sunday, I was desperate for some sleep in the afternoon.  Mamoon doesn’t want to sleep in the afternoon, though whenever Shruti and I cajole her into getting some sleep on Sundays and holidays, after initial protests, she is usually the first to nod off and would sleep soundly for a couple of hours at least.  But Mamoon resists and we sometimes don’t have the energy to argue with her and as it happens, a couple of Mamoon’s friends come over and Shruti graciously tells me to go catch my forty winks and says she’d keep an eye on them.  I feel horribly guilty about this.  I lie down and try very hard, and some noise disturbs me and I can’t sleep.  I get up within twenty minutes totally disjointed and mad.  So, the next week, I tell Shruti that I’d take care of Mamoon and ask her to catch up with some sleep.  Shruti falls asleep easily.  Chalo, at least somebody is getting some sleep.

This part of the narrative is connected to the other part that concerns the crumbling walls around me.  No, it is not as serious as it sounds.  At first when this used to happen I would be astonished.  How the hell, sort of reaction.  It used to (and continues to…) happen somewhat like this … I would go to the bedroom dressing table, have a look around, and then go and stand in front of the medicine cabinet and would be looking at the things kept on top of the washing machine … I am obviously looking for something … and out of the blue I’d hear Shruti’s voice, ‘the red hair brush is inside the cupboard below the dressing table…,’ I snap my head in her direction … how the hell … she has a wicked smile on her face … it was and is uncanny … then this started to happen too often for my comfort … she was tracing my line of thought … following my eye movement, head movement, my expressions … and then … wham!  your sweater is in the washing machine’ ‘we shall have biriyani for dinner today’ … I would be thinking about momos in the morning, and there she was thrusting a bag of momos towards me in the evening … how maan?  Can anybody track somebody’s thoughts and movements so accurately? Maybe I have stayed long enough with Shruti for her to understand every expression and every movement … yeah, but, who has the patience to observe … I feel like Watson before Holmes … have I become so transparent, I wondered … she would be observing me all the time (can’t help … too much love, you see …) but sometimes she’d just keep quiet, won’t say anything sparing a thought for my fragile feelings … aeh, I have become too predictable …

Coming back to the Sunday with which I started this narrative … that afternoon I desperately wanted to sleep … I didn’t want Mamoon to bring any of her friends over and I wanted her to sleep too, so that Shruti need not stay awake to keep an eye on her … all plans were in place and I wanted to tell Mamoon this … so, after lunch, I looked at Mamoon and said in a rising tone “Mamoon…” … she gave me a glum look and … “main so jaaoongi … I will go to sleep” … I couldn’t help bursting out … et tu mamoon?  The transparent-ation is complete …

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